My Story: 1. My first memory

My first memory was a dream.
I was old enough to walk, but was still drinking out of a bottle. So, maybe 1 to 2 1//2 years old? I remember climbing onto the living room couch in the apartment my parents and I lived in. At some point I fell asleep.

I dreamed that I floated up to the ceiling, becoming smaller as I did so, and entered the space between our apartment and the unit above us. The space transformed into a dark cave. I could see the opening of the cave, which allowed in some light.

Two monk-like figures came from the back of the back of the cave. I think they were wearing brown robes and one was taller than the other. They were talking about some very important information having to do with my life. I don't know how I knew this because I couldn't hear what they were saying. But I knew some very important decisions had to be made about the course of my life. I could tell that it was serious.

Sensing the seriousness of the matter, especially that it concerned MY life, I went up to the monks so I could join in the discussion. I wanted to be included too! I ran up and stood in front of them. They completely ignored me as if I wasn't even there. I felt incredibly excluded and bad about this. Why wouldn't they talk to me?

I finally gave up and watched as the monks eventually walked out of the mouth of the cave into the bright light outside. I considered leaving the cave as well. I was curious to see what the world outside was like, but felt insecure about doing so. Since the cave was known, it felt safer to stay where I was than to risk getting lost in the big world that existed outside.

I woke up, went into the kitchen, and my mother got a bottle out of the refrigerator for me to drink.

Until recently, this experience has always been a mystery to me. First of all, this dream is pretty mystical for a 2 year old! How would I have known what a monk was? And perhaps even more important, how the heck does a 2 year old know to think about the seriousness of future life decisions? 2 year olds do not think about themselves in the future that way. These questions were answered about 40 years later when I went to go see a shaman. I will save what he said for another time. :)

Read more about my life story here.