I came across this journal entry from a couple years ago. The energy of that journal is so loaded with drama. I was so frustrated and angry at the time, but now chuckle when I read this:
I'm angry with [therapist] because I feel like he was completely overstepping what I said about needing to accept that I'm a healer. I made the mistake of saying something about my life being screwed if I don't figure out what to do. He tried to steer me into thinking about how there are other things in life that can be fulfilling.
I know this already!
He tried "coaching" me into figuring out the essence of what I wanted in a career. [I had a background in coaching.]
I also know this! ...that there are other ways to be heart centered in a career.
I have a passion for what I am learning NOW! [I was taking classes in shamanic healing.]
I already told him I could always be a librarian. I'm not interested in going through all the work of finding another career. PLUS I would still need to believe in myself at the same level. [I assume I meant spiritual level and as my True Self (healed and unwounded self), which was undefined at the time due to not knowing what Spirit was guiding me toward.]
I wish our focus could have been on self love, self confidence, the steps I'm taking now. I feel like I need to be careful how I word things now. I actually felt worse and less confident after our session.
Wow. What a nightmare that whole 2-year ordeal was. It's such a blessing to be where I am now, knowing what I know and doing what I feel like is my True Purpose in this world.
I think everyone just wants to be able to use their hearts in this world. That is our true purpose.
